She is a paradox

I stumbled upon this quote and thought long and hard about the meaning of it — mainly because I think it applies so much to myself. I analyzed it long and hard and came to the conclusion that when people tell me "I'm confusing" they are actually right. I have a good idea what I want out of my life with my schooling and my career. Other than that, I'm just enjoying the ride. I don't have to have everything figured out right now and I'm coming to the conclusion that that's okay. Many times people in their fifties still don't have everything figured out.

I'm always faithful to the ones I love and the ones close to me but regardless, I never like to get too close. The words "I love you" are thrown around so often these days and I don't understand how. I still have a hard time saying it to the people I have known for years and truly do love. It's just a tough thing to let out of my mouth. It makes you vulnerable, and that's scary. I have no problem committing to people but I have to be one hundred percent sure that it's the right thing. If it isn't, isn't it just a waste of both of our time?

I break down, just like everyone does (hence the gentleness), but I never let anyone see that. I keep moving forward. That's how I like to live my life.

I like to enjoy the good and embrace the bad because everything is a lesson learned even if it is unpleasant or a not so good decision.

You have to be a pretty good person to put up with me but I guess the ones that stick around are the true ones in my life or they just don't have a choice (haha). I'm a paradox and pretty unpredictable — but I'm okay with that.